They should rename hurricanes "fun-icanes".

At least if they renamed hurricanes "funicanes" people would be less frightened as their roofs are blown off and they're sucked into the upper atmosphere to freeze to death.

It's 4 AM Sunday, and I've been waiting for fucking Hurricane Frances to get here since Friday night. They don't think it's going to leave Florida for about another 22-24 hours! It's very windy here, with occasional rain, and I can't imagine what the poor fuckers in Vero Beach, Melbourne and thereabouts have to deal with right now. Just the constant 30-40 mph wind here is freaky.

I still have power, which is amazing. Florida tends to lose power hours ahead of time, like a premature ejaculator loading his pants right as he walks in the whorehouse door. For Charley, the power went off in Daytona Beach three full hours before it even rained or blew a breath of wind, and I've seen on the news that many people have lost power in the northern counties, including Orlando, last night or yesterday afternoon.

I'm sure we'll lose power soon and then I'll just sit in the dark and make shadow puppets with a flashlight. I think a lot of the phone lines are underground, so I'd be able to make phone calls, except that all of my phones are portable! No power means now portable phones! I do have one none cordless phone, but it's a big converted payphone and I have to search for the key to unlock the back so I can plug in the damn phone cord. Oh well.

Here's to not dying.

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