Geeks

There are many different types of geeks out there. I am a self-professed geek, but I'm more like the amalgam geek - I know a little about a lot of different areas. Many geeks specialize in one main area, and you may not realize it, but you too could be a geek. Here are the different categories of geekdom (oh, and for my ease in typing, i'm going to refer to geeks as "he" even though we know the best geeks are women):

1. Computer geek - This geek can tell you the difference in latency between different brands of the same type of RAM off the top of his head. Building a computer is child's play, and this geek will usually have at least 3 fully working computers at once. Sometimes this type of geek and #2 below can be merged into one super computer geek, but you'll also see a lot of delineation along the hardware/software lines.

2. Programming geek - This particular brand of geek is the type who will post a snippet of code as a joke. He knows the difference between Perl and PHP and hates people who thinks that AJAX is an actual coding language. He probably uses Opera or maybe Firefox, thinks that Macs are pieces of shit, and has never paid for a software program in his life.

3. Comic book geek - Need every single member of the Green Lantern Corps named? Ask this geek. He knows what color of kryptonite kills Kryptonian plants, which element might be strong enough to hurt Wolverine's adamantium, and why the Joker is still alive. This type of geek also collects action figures and statues. Not to play with, mind you - to display.

4. Gaming geek - These guys used to be the Dungeons & Dragons kids from high school. Now that games have evolved into both the electronic realm like Everquest and World of Warcraft and with board games like Heroclix, these geeks have improved slightly. There is still a huge tendency for them to make jokes about multi-sided dice and points being added to their own physical attributes.

5. TV/movie geek - Did you know that Joss Whedon wrote several episodes of Roseanne? This geek not only knows that, but he'll know the most obscure shit that you'd never even suspect. This type of geek typically follows writers or directors around from show to show or movie to movie. They rarely follow actors around, with the exception of a few, like Bruce Campbell. To these geeks, once a director has touched their geek soul, they can do no wrong. They'll follow Joss Whedon or Peter Jackson or Guillermo del Toro or Bryan Singer to the ends of the earth.

6. The amalgam geek - this is what I am. I can build a computer, and I enjoy reading about the advances in hardware, but I can only understand every other word. I can hand code HTML and I program simple PHP, but I can't do anything advanced. However, I can flowchart the logistics for a function better than many programmers, so I work well with programmers who are trying to achieve a certain goal. I read and collect comic books, have many action figures and statues, and even have a lifesized Yoda in my office. I play video games, although I have never gotten into the MMORPG or roleplaying games. I know if I did, though, I'd be addicted. And I love TV and movies. I know more media trivia than most people, but not as much as some. I'll watch anything that Joss Whedon or Ben Edlund writes or directs, among others, and I dissect everything I watch almost clinically.

Did I forget any categories? I don't think so, but let me know if you think of any others. And this post will be followed by another one exploring why geeks are good.

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